Cowboy Boots

Let me get straight to the point -- I think I am less comfortable leaving the familiar behind than I thought I was.

By all means, don't understand me wrong. I am absolutely psyched about being in Morocco! I cannot wait to be there and see everything and meet new people and learn different dialects of Arabic. What crushes me I think is that this eagerness also doesn't spill over into my daily life as well.

Wherever I am in the world, I feel like I always need to be connected. Nobody really has to be physically present but there is a certain pressure from this globalized society that we are in today to be constantly communicating. Truth be told, I have lapses of isolation when I have no desire of being in touch. But I cannot say those last more than a couple of days.

My goal for Morocco is simple: to challenge myself to slowly let go of everything that is familiar to me. If I succeed, then I think I will have also learned more about myself.

If I fail, does this mean I have a 9-to-5 mentality that I cannot shake off? Is it American culture? Is it the Generation Y? Is it simply me?

I admit that I am attached to many, many things. I will miss much about the lifestyle that I am currently engaged in. Namely -- my cowboy boots.

I feel so secure in them. If I could wear them every day, I would. No matter what the weather, those boots are ready to endure whatever comes their way. The constant plop-plop of the sole make me feel grounded to something. There isn't much of a bounce in the shoe because this is a no-nonsense piece of art. There is something about it that makes me feel , well, happy.

I had made up my mind several weeks ago that I would take my boots with my to Morocco. When I felt like I needed to be home, I would simply pull them out and wear them around in the souks. Sure, I'd get a couple of glances and raised eyebrows, but afterall, I was in my beloved boots. Nobody can hurt me when they are on my feet.

But just now, I have decided to leave them at home, tucked in their box under my mattress. The only thing that I am bringing from home is myself. Everything else may be material but the only thing that can make me feel what I truly want to feel -- renewed -- is simply myself.

So adieu, cowboy boots! We'll catch up in February.