Square One

The first line on the first page
To the end of the last page
From the start in your own way
You just want somebody listening to what you say
It doesn't matter who you are
It doesn't matter who you are.

I'm Godawful at keeping journals. Winston Churchill's booming words of try try try try again have inspired me to start up yet another journal. This time it's online. Not sure if that makes much of a difference, but we'll see.

I'm leaving to Lebanon June 20-something. I think it's the 26th. My dad is with me for a good 10 days, then I'm on my own doing humanitarian work. It's really exciting and a bit crazy at the same time. I never thought I'd actually be doing this. I'm only there just short of 6 weeks and I want to make the most of it. I want to leave feeling like I didn't just lend my time, but that I've actually accomplished something. A project or goal of some sort.

Silly Lebanese, God designed them all the same way. We're procrastinators no matter what anyone says. Every email I've sent to virtually every nonprofit or NGO has come back with a reply of "Well, why don't you stop by once you get here and we'll figure out stuff then." I guess I need to start adjusting to the laid-back Middle Eastern way of life.

I've been home from my first year of college for about 4 weeks now. That's crazy. I cannot believe I'm done with this year. I'm looking forward to being an RA next year, that will definitely be something new. I also want to teach kickboxing on campus a couple of times a week. That's something I stopped doing as a freshman and I definitely regret it. We'll see what kind of liability or CPR certification I have to pursue to do that.

In other news, I've been teaching myself guitar for a while. I bought one for myself a while back but exams and Model UN and a bunch of other stuff didn't give me much time to really focus on it. It's a beautiful Spanish classical guitar, made and imported straight from Spain. My roommate took pictures of me excitedly opening the box when it first arrived in the mail after Spring Break. Imagine me walking across campus with that thing. I've been practicing 3 or 4 days a week, but I got really lazy this week and haven't picked it up since Sunday. So far, I can play some Jason Mraz and I'm attempting Coldplay. I'm still trying to perfect chords.

I've spent a lot of time playing around with my camera and doing photography stuff. I've done a couple of photoshoots for friends who are graduating or needed some family portraits done. I'm really excited about the photos I'll have once I get back from Lebanon. Everytime I think about it, there is just so much to do and see in the time I am there. I am more than willing to sacrifice some sleep and energy.

Hopefully AUB will get back to me about having a dorm while I'm there. Otherwise I'll stay with my aunt, who's amazing and fun, I just don't want to put a burden on someone. But they insist that I stay with them...of course. I'm torn, but I think it will just be more practical if I'm living on my own for a few weeks while I'm going in and out and traveling around the country. We'll see how that works out.

It's 1 in the morning and I have my alarm set at 7 AM for a morning run. Hah, that's not happening...I think I'll push it back a couple of hours...

Peace,
Asil